Friday, 21 February 2020

words...

I never believed in the old saying about sticks and stones and words... I always thought that words are so powerful that they can break bones! Remember how Hannibal Lecter convinces his fellow inmate to kill himself just with words in “Silence of the lambs”?... ok, extreme and gross, my example, but you get my drift... Words can bring the ultimate joy or the abysmal sorrow, words can make us feel like we are flying over fields of green and skies of blue (just like in the song...) or like we are slowly crawling down a dark pit... words... have always affected my life perhaps even more than the actual events... I have been offered words that I think I will never forget, not even when I have forgotten my own name... good words... bad words, mostly... words that have left their mark on my soul... unspeakable words... beautiful words... cruel words...

So, when last Saturday I went to the theatre to see the definitive play about words and their power, “Cyrano de Bergerac”, I knew it would be... well, powerful!... what I did not know, was that I was going to be so overwhelmed with emotions, like an avalanche, all of them at once, the good the bad and... the ugly! Because, James McAvoy’s Cyrano, is ugly... he is ugly because he feels ugly... and the famous big nose, that is not there physically to see, is somehow more present than ever! And I shared his pain, I shared his love, I shared his desperation, I shared his shame, I shared his fear, I shared his joy at times, I shared his brief moments of feeling superior, smug even, followed by long periods of feeling the most unworthy man on the face of the Earth... I shared his secret, I shared his laughter and his tears... and I shared all that because... he shared his words with me!

He says “ I love words, that’s all...”... yes... me too! I love words too! I love them, I dread them, I cherish them, I believe them, I ignore them, I forget them ever so often (if I had a Euro for every time I forgot the word I was looking for in the language I wanted it in... I would buy more shoes, probably...). Words tell our stories, express our feelings, allow people to know who we are or hide us from them, comfort us and let us comfort the ones we love, protect us or expose us, make us laugh, make us cry, make us happy, make us miserable... they make us kind or monstrous... they make or break relationships, they start and end wars... words make us human...

Words are better than shoes... but, just like shoes, they need to be chosen and used wisely 😉

Ps. Yes, the play was “better than shoes” too, of course, and yes, go see it if you still can! It’s unforgettable! 

Friday, 24 January 2020

speaking up...

...is better than shoes. Any day of the week.

I remembered the other day an incident from my childhood... I was 12 years old, year six of primary school, and for whatever reason we had a replacement teacher for a few days. He was young, much younger than our regular teacher who was also the school principal (and a pervert who put his dirty-old-man hairy hands all over us girls from year four to year six that he was our teacher... yeah... #metoo), and actually nice. But... one day, I don’t remember what he said but it was while we were having a conversation he and I, I exclaimed, rather indignant I might add, “what you are saying is unconstitutional and anti-democratic!”. Yep. Did I mention I was 12 at the time?...

I mean... I always had a big mouth... I was always very sensitive when it came to unfairness, abuse, violation of my rights, injustice... and I have not really changed, in spite of my mother’s pedagogical approach every time my reaction would be regarded from her as “talking back at her”... namely to beat the living lights out of me... No, I haven’t really changed... I still say exactly what is on my mind, I still argue my opinions, I still talk the talk (and walk the walk, if you are wondering...) and defend my rights and those of others who perhaps can’t... and yes, unsurprisingly, my big mouth has gotten me into trouble many a time and has put me in many a black list... but I have not regretted it! Not once! In fact, I have regretted not opening my mouth quite a few times!

We all, and especially we women, need to learn to be brave and speak up! We need to learn to defend ourselves, nobody else is going to do it for us. I mean, yes, I will (because I’m a modern day Robin Hood with much better shoes) but I cannot be there everywhere and for everyone! I would but I can’t! So you have to do it for yourselves! Speak up! Yes, it’s often scary, at least in the beginning, but you will get used to it! I promise you, you will get the hang of it, you will get good at it! Just... practice! And if it lands you in a black list (or two...), that’s ok too... only boring people are liked by everyone 😉

Wednesday, 15 January 2020

my new sweater...

...is better than shoes! Better than Aquazzura’s “Tequila” pumps (google them... don’t expect everything from me, people!), we are not talking any shoes! It is better, because I made it!

After having knitted scarves for everyone I love in the last three months (yes!... for everyone I love and I’m blessed in loving quite a few people who are all kept warm and cosy now) I decided to take the next step. Of course, the idea had been simmering for some time; I had found and bought the perfect yarn, I had seen countless videos on YouTube for techniques I would be needing, I had turned the hanks of yarn to balls (yeah... that takes time too... but, it’s pleasant when you do it while watching TDS) and put them in pretty boxes... I was preparing! And then, I did it!

Yep! I actually knitted a whole sweater by myself! From start to finish! And it is gorgeous! The yarn is the softest merino wool from Peru, softer than cashmere, hand-dyed in the most magnificent shades of purple and aubergine and yellow and green and blue and pink and red, making it absolutely uniquely beautiful! Well... unique... duh! There is not a second one in the whole wide world! Literally, one of a kind! And it is mine and I made it! I don’t remember being so proud of myself  about anything in the last... oh... I don’t know... a very long time anyway! And I’m proud not just because I made it but because I saw it through! I set a goal (not my cup of tea...) to knit a sweater, and achieved it! I did not give up, I did not get scared (ok... truth be told, I did get scared when shaping the neckline but not enough to give up) and I finished it!

And... when I put it on for the first time... oh, the feeling of wearing such a beautiful piece of clothing totally created by me, was indescribable! It was definitely and absolutely better than shoes!!

Ps. So far, I have received only compliments from my besties who got pics of it... later today I’m wearing it in public 😉