Friday, 4 October 2019

talking...

...is better than shoes. Now, I know this sounds a bit silly but let me explain.

I have been sick for a week... I mean, “sick” doesn’t even begin to describe it, I have been bed-bound and miserable and exhausted beyond belief, that’s what I have been! Today is the first day I manage to actually hold my iPad for more than 3’! And make some tea without having to sit down while the water boils! And as I have been in bed all this time, I have watched lots and lots of  TV... I ended up even watching this series “Divorce” (good for when you are at home with the flu...) and I noticed the following: people my age having relationships that end without even exchanging one word about it! Receiving a text that says “this is it? Call me!” and just ignoring it! From someone they were intimate with! I mean, when did this “efficient” handling of relationships become the fashion?! Where was I?!

I do not believe in the silent treatment! I do not condone ending relationships without a real conversation. Hell, I do not understand how is it possible for adults to not talk about things that concern them, hurt them, annoy them or even infuriate them! Ghosting?? That’s just ridiculous, we are not 14, we can and we should be able to handle a conversation, a discussion even, about anything! Even when we have screwed up! Especially when we have screwed up!  When something bad happens, say one does something we don’t like,  we should be able to say so and the other person should be able to listen and rebut if they believe it to be false or apologise if they think it is appropriate. Bad things do not just disappear, they linger! And they fester! Unless we talk about them, clear the air one way or the other and move on. With a smile!

No, I do not understand how is it possible at our age to avoid talking about things! Are we so arrogant? Are we so indifferent? Is it that we don’t have the time? That we are so busy and important?! Is it that we do not want to admit having done anything wrong? We are human! Of course we do the wrong thing every now and then! But by avoiding to talk about it will not make it as if it never happened! To the contrary, it will just make it imprint in peoples’ memories as the last thing we did... is that what we really want? I don’t think so... so... talk! And listen! Clear the air! Communicate, my darlings! We are civilised!

Saturday, 14 September 2019

lamb chops with green peas...

I love cooking! I love it because it is an act of love! You love the ingredients, you put love in the process and most importantly, if you are lucky enough, you share the fruit of your labour with the ones you love! It is all about love! Love for the people in your life, love for the flavours, love for the memories it will bring while you eat or the new ones it will create, love for the conversation which may accompany the savouring... what could be better than this!

I love cooking but, as you may have guessed from the above, for me it is all about cooking for the people I love! About cooking food to be shared, to be part of a communal experience! About seeing the smiles on the faces of my loved ones when they taste it and I can see I got it right and I pleased them! It’s my offer! Very, very rarely I will take the time and make the effort to cook something special just for me... perhaps I don’t love myself enough... perhaps... usually (lately) I eat lunch at work with my best buddies and then I have a very simple dinner at home, like chicken or salmon and quinoa, a soup, a salad, a sandwich... eating on the sofa in front of the tv... I know... not great...

But every now and then I actually indulge myself in something extra... when I need to pamper myself a bit... like today... I have just finished eating and I still have the taste in my mouth... and, false modesty aside, I just cooked and ate the most delicious stewed lamb chops with green peas of my life! I really did it this time! The flavours were all perfect, the taste of the organic lamb, cooked to the point of the little bones falling off, the extra virgin olive oil (what else?...), a bit of cinnamon and nutmeg (cinnamon is the spice of love and is perfect for tomato sauces), the dill that compliments the green peas so well, the dry white wine that went in (of course...), the caramelised onions in the thick sauce which of course called for some whole grain bread... oh, it was heavenly! And the best thing is that I cooked for two so... my lunch for tomorrow is settled! “Better than shoes”? You bet!! 

Saturday, 24 August 2019

falling in love...

A couple of weeks ago, I was watching “The mirror has two faces” and there was that scene where Barbra Streisand is at the university giving a class and it’s about love and its socio-historical importance (or something like that...) and in the end she says that, although there’s much to be said about it, we all want to fall in love “because it feels f@cking great!!”. Yes! Exactly! It does! Thank you, Barbra!!

So as I’m laying on the beach, letting the sun turn me into a bronze goddess (or something like that...) while listening to the waves break on the shore, I’m thinking again about that. Yes! I want that! Damn it, I’m not that old! I want to fall in love! Head-over-heels, my-friends-tease-me-about-it, all-consuming, good old L-O-V-E! I want to walk around with a silly smile on my face, I want to check my phone for texts, I want to be giddy like a schoolgirl and tell my besties all about him and count the minutes until I’m in his arms again! In the arms of a man who’s equally head-over-heels in love with me, all giddy like a schoolboy, telling his mates all about me and being teased sensesly by them!

A man who will make space for me in his life because he will be sure that his life is better with me in it! A man who will care and take care of me and who will know when I need him without me having to tell him... because he will know I don’t like to need anyone. A man who will want to see the world with me and share new experiences and also stay in pyjamas on Sundays watching Netflix on the sofa. A man who thinks that monogamy is cool! Oh, and he likes hot chocolate with Kalhua in it.

Yes. Here, today, on this island I decided I’m not afraid to say that I want to fall in love with such a man, nothing less. And I know it’s a long shot but... no more “managing my expectations” to be satisfied with breadcrumbs, no more being scared... I want the full shebang and I’m ready for it! Because, as Barbra said, “it feels f@cking great”! And it is better than shoes!