Happy children!

Well, it's no secret that I am not a fan of kids... Still my maternal instincts have not kicked in... not quite sure whether they ever will but not stupid enough to exclude the possibility I still get by without really giving it much thought... Now, when it comes to other people's children, I do have clearer views...  Some years ago I have been attacked and kicked in the leg by a kid in a super market, without any other reason than being there and please do not ask where did this happen, the answer is obvious... I have to say I hated it... and I do hate it when kids scream, cry, fight or shout in my vicinity, always coming to the conclusion that their parents are doing something wrong for the children to behave like that... the same parents that usually remain apathetic towards the above mentioned kids' behaviour...

Obviously some of you may be tempted to tell me to "keep quiet as I do not have children of my own and thus should not be so judgemental"... Ok, I respect your opinion. But hear me out, I do have arguments for this view point. I have not yet met children of happy, calm and loving couples, of parents who shower them with love and attention and respect them and each other, who scream, kick or shout!! Children need attention, because, let's face it, a child when very young, only has its parents! We, adults, have friends, family, partners, colleagues, in one word lots of people to share our life and experiences with. Children, until a certain age that is, only have their parents to share their, numerous, experiences with. And when their parents do not give then enough attention and love and support, usually they scream for it :)

Some time ago I visited a friend's house. He and his wife are of different nationalities and have three kids, all less than eight years of age. Two of them were up when I went to their place and were playing in the living room with us while we, the adults, were having a cup of coffee... such beautiful children with amazing, bright smiles on their faces and polite as can be! They made a castle of pillows in a corner in the room and kept playing in our company, practically invisible but obviously content. They had their fun, we had ours! No screaming, no arguing between them, no interruptions, no claiming attention... just fun! Now, that says to me that the parents are doing something very right there! Happy children are the product of happy parents and happy, fortunate unions and that, my friends, all that, IS better than shoes!

a positive outlook on life...

I have a very good friend back home... well, I have many and I consider myself privileged for that (I have already expressed how I feel about my friends in this blog, will not repeat...) but I just wanted to talk about this specific one: She is the one who taught me the importance and the benefit of having a positive outlook on life! She had not have it easy in her life, no sir... But she always manages to see the bright side (no Monty Python stuff...) on almost everything. She is not a saint nor a martyr and she is certainly not always happy but she helped me see that things are what they are, some we can change and some not, but how we look at things (and life...) is up to us! Entirely! And this is a marvelous thing!!! A "better than shoes" thing!

Surely it is easier to be sour... it is easier to have a nasty, bitchy, negative comment than a nice one... "yeah, sure she is young, tall and pretty but look at those ankles!!!" Ok, perhaps it is true that the goddess next door has chubby ankles but... who cares? Why feel the need to point that out?? Can't we just see her beauty, wherever that is, and stay in that? It is easy to be sarcastic and pissy and negative but what about just being positive? Surely we can disagree with people, but why be so insecure and childish as to try and ridicule their views? Surely we can tell a friend that she looks fat (and perhaps it is true that she gained a bit of weight lately...) but what do we gain?? Why not just say "you look great" and not as a fake, empty compliment but because she really looks great in out eyes! Because we see her as beautiful!! Because we choose to see her as beautiful!

And no, by this I do not mean to see it all roses!!! This would not be true, nobody likes everything and everyone! It is not possible to agree with everyone all the time! All I'm trying to say is that maintaining a positive outlook on life has the advantage of improving our life for real (no placebo effect...) and that sometimes it would be better not to say anything if we have nothing good to say... the world as it is is full of negativity anyway...

I have chosen to try to be positive... And this blog is a grand proof of my efforts!! I have promised to keep positive and I have not disappointed myself yet as  have managed NOT to pass to you all the bad (or just the annoying) stuff that has happened to me over the last two years... No, I do not manage to keep positive always... I, too, tend to whine and be grumpy and moody and complaining... In those moments though, I do make an effort to find the bright side of things... it is always there to be seen!And if you can't see it at first glance, look again ;) And if that fails, put on a pair of high heels and look at the world from a different angle :)

Dignity...

The Oxford Dictionary defines dignity as "the state or quality of being worthy of respect"... if I were to try and define it (well... in the improbable case that anyone would ask me to define "dignity"...) I would just mention a name: Vanessa Redgrave

Of course I had seen her films... and TV series... and heard about her theater work, though never had the pleasure to actually see one of them... I did know that she comes from a theater family and that great talent has been the "family heirloom" and that her brother and sister were also actors and I had known them too... But all of that did not prepare me for the overflow of emotion that I was to experience while watching an interview she gave to the BBC some time ago. It was late at night, on a Sunday I think, I was already in bed (yes, no party animal here...) and I saw it being advertised that the interview with this amazing woman would pass. Needless to say I stayed up, excited I would get to know her a bit better!

And I did! What a lady!!! The soft, almost seducing, warm voice, the movement of her hands, the smile on her beautiful face, the grace of her manners, the wisdom of her words and the humility and love with which she expressed herself about acting.... I was charmed! A political person with strong views, an actor who has played all that it was worth playing, a mother who lost a child, a sister who lost two brothers and a sister and, above all in my opinion, a woman who appeared, for lack of a better word, complete... And the way she spoke, calm and steady and composed yet passionate... I could not stop thinking that that is dignity!

Respect for others makes us better human beings, I think. And since dignity is the state of being worthy of respect, then, dignity of others makes us respect them hence becoming better... and if, just if, we could make others better by our own dignity, what a great power this would be! In any case, and for fear of starting to talk nonsense, as these concepts are rather complicated and it is quite late,  I will just stop now by simply saying that dignity is better than shoes and leave you to your conclusions...